My Inspiration: Monsters


Monsters scare me. I’m on the wrong side of my 20s and they still do. All I have are nightmares (with the rare exception of that one time with Prince Harry…)

As an adult, monsters don’t present themselves like the gifs you see above. Instead, one monster is my rapist. One is my father who abused me for 15 years. The rest are Islamic terrorists (I’m a New Yorker- 9/11- don’t fuck with me). Also, the ocean. The ocean is one big monster. That came after Hurricane Sandy. And, oh, I must not forget my multiple sclerosis/scleroderma/other autoimmune diseases that will progress in time. Now that I’m thinking about it, time is a monster.

I’m a trauma poet. And the monsters I listed above traumatized me. They fucked me up… Pills, pills, pills. Tears, tears, tears. Blades, blades, blades. Hopeless. No light. With a self-hatred so strong it’s blinding to…

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