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This book has been a long time coming. It’s something that has been playing in my mind for several years, especially in the last year. It wasn’t until my son and I had an argument which then turned into a discussion about God. He’s still young, and his words to me this afternoon struck me to my core. He told me that he didn’t believe there was a God, or there was a Heaven. He felt that if there truly was a God, then why would we have to suffer? At first, I didn’t know what to say to him as I have often asked the same question. So many prayers that I have prayed have seemed to have gone unanswered, so many times I have cursed God myself for allowing things to transpire in my life that I felt were not fair, but to hear the words come out of my son’s mouth, was like a knife to the heart.
I never took my children to church to learn about God. I wasn’t like my mother who insisted my brothers and I go every Sunday and Wednesday. I remember growing up how I would enjoy it when I got there, it was the getting there that I had trouble with. Even in my teenage years, it was hard for me to embrace going to church and if it wasn’t for one particular woman, who took me under her wing to teach me there was more than sitting on pew listening to a sermon, I doubt I would have kept going. This woman taught me the realness of what God wanted from us. She taught me how to be humble, love others more than myself and serve Him in a way that was different. I was happier during those years than I have ever been in my entire life and a part of me wishes I had followed God’s call to be a missionary, but I chose not to. I didn’t listen to Him when He spoke to me that night at the conference in Gatlinburg. I heard Him, but I didn’t follow through and do it.
I imagine my life would have been extremely different, but then I wouldn’t have married and had two beautiful children either. So maybe, it’s okay that I didn’t choose to follow my call, maybe God knew I had another path I could go down and if I at least walked that path with Him, things would be okay. I didn’t walk the path with Him, I walked it alone.
They say that when you go against God that you not only curse yourself but you curse your family too. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but it sure feels that way. After all, I am responsible for how my children are raised and Lord knows, I didn’t raise them up right. My mother tried to tell me. She would say, “Donna, you need to get these kids in church. They need to be taught about God.” I either wouldn’t answer her or just say, I know mom, or make up another excuse. It doesn’t matter, I didn’t do it right. Religion means nothing, but raising your children to know Jesus Christ and His Father is the one sole purpose of what we as parents are meant to do. It’s our responsibility to ensure that they get to know Him, and while I loathed “church” and wanted no part of it, I didn’t find another way for them to learn what God was all about. I am failing at this and I fear that it may be too late for me to bring my children around.
These words I am writing are from God. I think he has been pushing me to write them for quite some time and finally with a good shove from above, I am writing what He wants us to know about who He is. Not the Bible version really, but the true spirit and love that He offers. That’s what I think He wants me to talk about here in my writing. We can all open the Bible and read the history of how mankind was made and what happened during that time, but this is the here and now and people need to know what God is thinking.
I am hoping one day my children will read this and fully understand my motive in writing this book, and will come to understand who God really is for them. I hope that in reading these pages, you gain some wisdom about our Father as well. He wants to be a part of your life and He wants it to be easy for you to understand and feel compelled to come to Him.